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Blog Post 8

Hello to all! Here I am, back once again for another slightly questionable blog post from a highly questionable individual. I hope you are all doing well, and staying nice and cosy throughout these days of chill.

It’s crazy to think that we have already braced the wonderful month of March. You might be wondering, what is so wonderful about it? What makes March just that inch more special than the other 11 months of the year? Why, it’s my birthday of course! The big 19… I never thought I’d see the day. My birthday is always a pretty fun time, because It’s a day entirely devoted to me! What could be more special and exciting? Any opportunity I come across to talk about myself is an awesome opportunity, because after all, who wouldn’t want to hear about the great Shannon Baker?!

Haha, I’m just teasing. I’m really not as self-centred as a proclaim to be, sometimes. But in all seriousness, the 31stshould be a lot of fun. I’m excited to bite into a big piece of cake after so many months!

A couple of weeks ago to date, I made two pretty big and rather tough decisions that would certainly shape my future for good. Two decisions that I had been contemplating for a little while now, and felt I desperately needed to act upon in order to progress with my life and achieve the things I truly wanted to achieve. For a start, I decided to hand my notice in at my retail job. Things were becoming slightly more challenging for me then I initially thought, and all it took were a few minor setbacks for me to finally realise and acknowledge that things were becoming way too much for me. Handing my notice in was not easy, I was devastated to be frank! And I still wonder if my decision to leave was the right one, but I know deep down that I had to go. Nonetheless, I enjoyed my time as a sales assistant more then I could have ever imagined. I met so many wonderful, interesting people throughout my months spent working for the company, and even made some friends for life in my amazing colleagues. I’ve said it before on many different occasions, but I am extremely proud of myself for stepping so widely out of my comfort zone, and managing to cope throughout all the months I spent at this job. I never thought I would ever manage to work. I always viewed myself as far too much of an anxious mess, but I proved myself and my fears wrong. I am living proof that anything is possible if you really want it.

So, I’ve given up my job. What is next for me? What could I, someone who reallyenjoys and appreciates the world of art, and has never done anything to further pursue that passion apart from sitting in my room with an overpriced drawing tablet and a dream, and has NEVER EVER had the courage to go to college due to previous anxieties that I no longer have to deal with, do now? What could the next step be for me…

Well.. after thinking long and hard, and taking everything I have achieved so far into consideration, I have decided that... (Drum roll please!)

I am going to go to college! Finally! Queue the clapping and abundance of exploding party poppers.

I know, I know, this decision is long overdue for some people that may know me. The folks at Teasledown come to mind, but It’s finally happening! Congrats guys, you won.

Yes indeed, the next chapter of my life lies in the heart of Colchester Institute, where I will start off by studying Art and Design, and will eventually work my way up the ranks to study Level 3 Graphic design. My excitement has certainly peaked, and I cannot wait to start this brand-new journey.

But that doesn’t mean my anxieties are no longer there. My memories of a mainstream environment, and the struggle and ridicule I faced still continue to haunt me, but given my vast improvement over the past couple of years, and my new-found sense of determination and pride, I am more than certain that I can take this adventure head on. I want to be proved wrong, that not all mainstream environments are to be feared and that I will always get hurt. I want to be able to flourish. I am tired of letting the words of others stop me from achieving my goals. I am worth more then the things they say. There is more to me then my appearance and my size.

I may not have achieved all of my goals just yet, but I am the living embodiment of success. I am determined to change my life, and I will not rest until I have made the difference I so desperately desire.

Thank you all so much for reading once again, and remember to mark March the 31stin your calendars! :D

Peace and love,

Shannon. 😊

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